Snowday.

Ever wonder why you’re here? And how do you know if you’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing?

The one human thing that makes my life even remotely exceptional is the seemingly endless stream of unusual experiences. Take today for instance.
We all know this weekend was very cold in many areas. Here at my house…well let’s just say I figured out by obvious deduction where the drafts had been coming in: through my kitchen floor!
Apparently the “add-on” off the back is not insulated. Taking those baseboards off when we had the (unbelievably wonderful surprise-we-didn’t-know-they-were-there) maple kitchen floors refinished really did us a harm because the power company sends us unbelievable-surprise-we-didn’t-know-they-were-coming bills! Not to mention the icy ‘kitchen-feet!’ So this evening, I rustled up all the kids and had them move furniture, run up and down the stairs to find things and generally made them miserable. After about 2 hours, the kitchen looked like something out of Green Acres! The back door is now walled off with curtains.
I found some unopened rug liners that were meant for the living room. They are now carpeting the kitchen floor. An old sheet over that, about 10 throw rugs later, and I now have what looks like a Russian apartment in a very dark time Now tell me- why did God put me on this earth? Is doing stuff like this really a calling? Do you know my whole life is like this? I do unorthodox things as a lifestyle! If a woman spends hours retrieving small rugs to keep her kitchen warm in the forest and no one notices- does it count??

Today was a snow day. For the 4 hours prior to the kitchen fiasco I worked with the twins in their room. Too many clothes. Too many treasures. Bummer! They threw things away until it hurt. But now their room looks charming! Baby-pink crushed velvet curtains over white-on-white polka-dot panels. Lots of flowers. A place for the geckos. And I finally got that china cabinet out of there! (They were thrilled!) (And tired!)

Did I mention that I watched my son go back to College with his back tire spinning freely while he steered the car (from outside the car) through the open driver’s door. He looked like a human tugboat. The street was so thick with ice that he literally pushed the car with one hand and steered it with the other! I’m still waiting to hear that he made it back ok.

I feel small and cold.

Now the house is dark and quiet. All my fun teen-agers are in their places with their large dogs and space heaters, respectively. I sit at my computer, wrapped in a red blanket, thinking. The screen-saver is our family stock of digital pictures. A close-up of a gecko on a bright pink bath puff appears, then, it’s cage-mate poses on the stained-glass living room lamp. I watch the pictures…and remember the hysterical jokes my son was making, and the comfort my daughters were giving as I went ballistic on the kitchen. It hits me. Life is happening. And I get to be here. I get to teach my daughters again what it means to be unhindered by stuff. I get to do something weird and show my kids how to break the box and do what’s necessary in life. I get to hear my quiet son be funny when most people don’t get that from him. I get to feel loved by my daughters as they try to help me the best they can without understanding what in the world I’m doing!

If a woman spends hours retrieving small rugs to keep her kitchen warm in the forest and no one notices- does it count? Probably to no one but the woman …and her 5 kids …and God. My calling: Maybe today it’s to clean out trinket boxes and yarn bits from junk drawers; to hang curtains over doors when necessary (ok- weather-stripping is better!). In this dark room behind me there are still loads of curtains to put away. My kitchen is now warmer but it is still filled with the dishes that didn’t get done because of all the projects. And yes, I don’t question being called to my kids: to loving them, and listening to them and making them important. But the part I forget is the part for me. The bending and stretching, the embracing of the changes…that makes me alive! And I’ve got a hunch that it’s the seed of life that lives in the changes that I’ll recognize when I get to heaven. My calling in life isn’t just for everyone else. Yes I serve…but I get to watch small but amazing changes happen everyday. Finding humor is blessing from God- but finding my 17 year old son extremely funny is impossibly funny! Making a room beautiful is fun- but aching through the struggles with my daughters before the beauty comes- that means I got the chance to teach them something difficult but valuable. That’s being used by God. Whether anyone else in the forest notices or not- I should notice. Because many of the blessings I’m called to are meant exclusively for me.

And with all of that comes the distinct impression that I’m doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing. Curtains and all!